A Solo Adventure Lead to the Best Day of My Life 🐒
I was talking to a friend once and I mentioned I had been bored recently, to which he replied, “If you’re bored, that’s your own fault”. At first I thought that was a silly thing to say, I mean I can’t help it if there is nothing to do. I thought about his words for the rest of the night, and realized he was right. Being bored was my own fault. There were street fairs happening right around the corner. Bars that were open till 2am. Free concerts a short bus ride away. I was letting opportunities pass by each day, because the idea of “plans” were centered around my constantly busy friends.
I decided to change that. I woke up the following Saturday, got dressed, and walked in a random direction.
I walked into a bar in San Francisco on Haight street without knowing a single soul. I was trying the whole “keep myself from being bored” tactic. Whenever I go out with friends, I find myself conversing with them and only them. We’ll have our drinks, do our thing, dance a bit, but we hardly ever converse with outsiders. Mostly because when we all go out together we want to pay attention to our friends and have a good time, without focusing on hooking up or making new friends in loud and overcrowded atmospheres. In fact, thanks to Drake, No New Friends became a common saying for us (and many others).
Today I was on my own. I said screw it and ordered a cider from the waitress. When she walked over with my drink, she asked what I was doing alone. I mentioned how all my friends were busy and I didn’t have much to do that afternoon and told her about the “no excuses for being bored” idea. Funny enough, she had just moved here from England and didn’t have a single soul in the city that she could call up. I offered up my company with some drinks after her shift or a party down the way I heard about. I was completely shocked when she was down to hang out after her shift ended. She had no idea who I was, where I came from, or what my intentions were. All she knew was my card info and that I prefer a Cider over and IPA. Did I just make a friend in my first ten minutes of solo-adventuring?
The only catch? Her shift ended in 3 hours. I could wait. I mean, what else did I have to do? I ended up ordering another drink, when the guy at the table across from me asked if I was alone. He was here visiting with family, and him and his two friends needed a pool partner. Was I open to joining them? I mean, what did I have to lose?
I shot pool with this great group of guys who ended up being out of towners from the East coast. I got to hear all sorts of stories about their travels here, where they were from, and what’s happened so far on their trip. One of them was a professional pool player and taught me a few new skills to sharpen up my pool skills. Once we all finished a game and got to know each other more, we all ended up doing shots together. (Yes it was like 1PM but whatever, you only live once right?).
After I took my shot, I realized there was another guy sitting across the way alone. I invited him over to hang and started some small talk. His name was Mikel and he had just moved here from New York. He decided to walk down to the closest bar from his front door since he hadn’t developed a sense of direction yet in the city. We talked over a drink, got to know each other a bit more, and I ended up learning that he shot commercials for companies like HP. He didn’t know ONE person in the city, just like the waitress I met earlier.
I waited for her shift to end and we chugged one last cider together before walking to a nearby bar down the street. By this point I was pretty tipsy. It had been three hours and I found myself 4 ciders and a shot deep by 4PM. She had broughten her bike to work with her, and I had parked mine a block up, when the rush of spontaneity hit me again. Why don’t we go for a bike ride? The city is only 7×7, we could go anywhere. We grabbed our bikes and headed towards the bay. If you’ve ever biked in a city, you know there is nothing quite like weaving in and out of the cars down a busy street, with the loud bustling cityscape behind you. We made our way down to the water and stopped off to get a bottle of wine at a corner store.
We walked out to the pier and popped open our wine. We talked about life. How she ended up here from England. How I ended up here from Florida. What I liked. What she liked. We watched the sunset behind the bridge as we finished off our bottle and agreed how beautiful it was that our paths had so randomly crossed. We ended up making out and going home together that night. Oops.
How many times did I miss out on forming connections such as these by sitting in my room and watching Netflix because my friends were busy? How many opportunities have I missed by being afraid to go somewhere alone? What if I had come with my friends that day? Would no-one have approached me? Would I not have learned each and every story I had encountered today?
That’s why I use Spontime. It’s new social media, the first app for spontaneous meetings with friends or people nearby.
Some of us are afraid to adventure on our own. In fact, half the girls I know don’t even want to go to the bathroom alone. We’re not sure what will happen. We think others will judge us across the bar. We think we may get bored. But what we don’t realize is that there are others just like us, looking to form connections, to make new friends, and to have a good time. Every day is an adventure, if you decide to make it one.